laugh now, alligator: Archive

Dec 30th

17,331 notes

1 tag

the only reasons i can think of for why girls say ‘I HATE SLAGS!!!’ jealous that certain girls are getting some action can’t relate to girls who wear revealing clothes and therefore feel intimidated can’t relate to ‘promiscuous’ girls and therefore feel intimidated honestly just are really scared of the idea of a sexual woman (???) i can’t think of...

Dec 28th

27 notes

My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2011-12-25) →

Rilo Kiley (24) Frightened Rabbit (14) Hello Saferide (10) Camera Obscura (10) Caitlin Rose (8) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz

Dec 28th

1 tag

i am not my body or how i choose to destroy it

Dec 27th

7 notes

i’ve repressed so many of my memories because they’re too embarrassing to think about without wanting to DIE

Dec 26th

Dec 23rd

128 notes

1 tag

i wanted you to love me like you used to do

Dec 23rd

3 notes

1 tag

Dec 23rd

6,504 notes

“There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be...”

– Erma Bombeck (via misswallflower)

Dec 22nd

762 notes

2 tags

me: hey what's up

vegetarian: i'm a vegetarian

Dec 21st

6,880 notes

2 tags

Dec 21st

My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2011-12-18) →

The Mountain Goats (27) Allo Darlin’ (21) Fionn Regan (15) Frightened Rabbit (14) Margot & the Nuclear So and So’s (11) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz

Dec 21st

2 notes

2 tags

i make salads in a misguided attempt to be healthy and they always end up being huge massive bowlfuls and i say ‘yay i can prolong the healthiness and save it for another meal’ and then i EAT IT ALL AND DIE OF FULLNESS BUT DON’T STOP EATING EVER

Dec 20th

3 notes

1 tag

permanently craving toast

Dec 19th

7 notes

junehymn: silent night laura marling so… this...

Dec 18th

141 notes

when my sims sleep in the wrong bed

no you little dumbass I made your bedroom to specifically represent your personality why do you insist on sleeping there stop it at once young man you are a disappointment to this household

Dec 18th

15,898 notes

Dec 17th

902 notes

1 tag

Dec 17th

133 notes

Dec 16th

31,023 notes

Dec 16th

447 notes

2 tags

you said 'all the money in the world won't buy a...

Dec 15th

2 notes

2 tags

i’m sad because i accidentally ate bacon today. and it didn’t even taste nice

Dec 15th

1 note

Dec 15th

14,630 notes

2 tags

Dec 15th

869 notes

Dec 13th

4,613 notes

2 tags

Dec 13th

10 notes

“There is a kind of crying I hope you have not experienced, and it is not just...”

– Lemony Snicket (via amantesuntamentes)

Dec 12th

5,225 notes

4 tags

i was trying to get this boy i like into some good music (i.e. music i listen to) and he text me before saying that he thought ‘neutral goats’ were good awwww

Dec 12th

Dec 11th

1,226 notes

1 tag

i just do stuff to creep people out on purpose for a joke even if i really like them and then sometimes they don’t get it and think i’m weird. then they don’t like me back

Dec 10th

2 tags

After studying for three hours, here is what I...

Christianity: Wow man it sure is easier to worship god and not go to hell now this is super duper
Peasants and Nobles: Man we hate corrupt clergy time for like six million reforms that keep failing
Jews: We don't bother anyone just living in these ghettos you make us live in
Muslims: We've just got our empire over here NBD
Papacy: Fuck you monarchs and nobles we be ballin' we run the world
Inquisition: NO ONE SUSPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION
Catholic Church: Get out of here Eastern Orthodox church you are annoying here we excommunicated you
Eastern Orthodox Church: Well we excommunicated you too so there
Catholic Church: Let's go on some fucking CRUSADES
Eastern Orthodox Church: YEAH
Peasants: Let's kill some Jews
Jews: What the heck guys not cool
Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Churches: They see us crusadin', they hatin'
Catholic Church: Crusadin' against the Eastern Orthodox Church lol
Eastern Orthodox Church: Are you KIDDING ME
Jews: Ugh we are just going to Eastern Europe bye
Muslims: Wow Christians only one crusade out of like four worked out for you and you lost everything from that one way to go
Christians: Well we're not crusading anymore we're just fighting with all the other religions all the time
Muslims: Okay
Jews: Oh
Pagans: God dammit
Genghis Khan: Hey guys
Europe: Shit

Dec 6th

4,353 notes

3 tags

why do people always say they really like tea on tumblr and constantly go on about tea example info on tumblr: ‘hi i’m fred welcome to my blog, i like harry potter and tea’ tea is nice but its just TEA. its about on the same level of interestingness as talking about socks

Dec 5th

9 notes

heldherwithfive: eveningland: repeircing my nose with a safety pin. this takes procrastination to a whole new level. oh gawd:D emma i swear you said once in form that you peirce your ears all the time with pins!!! i remember being really shocked hahahaha

Dec 5th

4 notes

1 tag

repeircing my nose with a safety pin. this takes procrastination to a whole new level.

Dec 5th

4 notes